The 3 C’s: What you really need and how to get it
Could every issue you face boil down to a C word? No, it’s not communication—although that plays a role. In fact, you have a choice of 3 C’s: control, connection or competence. These are core emotional needs that sit at the root of your discontent. When neglected,...
Can People Change?
Can people change? I am frequently asked this question, despite my therapy practice having the tag line create meaningful change. I usually answer with a simple “yes, of course I believe people can change, that’s why I do what I do”. It seems however that scepticism...
Tips for Launching your Counselling Private Practice
Are you considering going into private practice? Does the idea fill you with a combination of excitement and fear? Like most things in life, owning a private practice comes with pros and cons. One of the major benefits is you can work in your own way, sculpting the...
How to do Self-Love
I’m sure you have heard the cliché; you need to love yourself first. But what the heck does that mean and how do you do it? If you are baffled by the concept of self-love, you are not alone. Unfortunately, this essential life skill remains a mystery to many. So, let’s...
Curiosity: The Great Un-sticker (Part 2)
This is a sequel about getting unstuck. In the previous edition, Curiosity helped us understand the problem (read it here). This is an incredibly important part of the process, so don’t skip it. You need to enter this second phase with a firm grasp on the problem. If...
Curiosity: The Great Un-sticker (Part One)
Are you feeling stuck? Stuck at work, in a relationship or on a project? Does it feel like there is no way out? I bet you there is. Yes, I know you haven’t been twiddling your thumbs, waiting for your ‘stuckness’ to pass. You feel stuck because you have thought of and...
Expectations: Your Emotional Dial Controllers
What are you expecting from this blog? Perhaps, to be entertained, educated, or inspired? Or are you keeping your expectations low (after all you’ve been disappointed by blogs before)? Either way, these expectations will influence your experience it. That’s because...
Hope and Boundaries – A Dynamic Duo
As you stand at the starting block, another year ahead, are you hoping at to improve at least one area of your life this year? I hope so! That is, I hope, you hope to make some form of positive change. In an earlier blog (Response-ability) we touched on the idea of...
Keep your Relationship Accounts in the Black
We make bids for connection every day. These can be as simple as smile, a text, a hug, sharing a story or idea. Some of our bids get accepted while others get rejected or ignored. These failed bids for connection are behind many of our interpersonal conflicts (aka The...
Strengths – The Antidote to Not Good Enough
Relax: I’m lightening the mood. Last month I dared you to press pause on your pain-killing machine to acknowledge your painful emotions. Permitting yourself to be vulnerable is important, especially if you rarely do so. Just note, I did say pause and not stop. I...